IT IS AN OPEN LETTER part 2
October 10, 2019
I would be lying to say that it has stopped hurting
I would be lying to say that i don't remember about you
I cant seem to think bad about you
All I ever remember was how happy you made me back then.
But then i dont like playing around,
Messing around is not my cup of tea, but they were your cup tea.
I thought I am slowly healing
But there were days I feel like i am back to square one.
But these thoughts about you have stopped coming in regularly.
They just come at me when I am alone,
They just come at me when I am alone,
They just come at me when I feel I am alone.
So I tried to not be alone.
Finding new hobbies, setting new goals, mending broken friendships, importantly start focusing on my family.
All I ever want is to live in peace and I cant do that with you standing so close.
You know those songs that you shared?
I stopped listening to them.
The voicenotes of you singing?
I deleted them.
Your pictures?
They already left my phone's memory.
I no longer viewed you statuses.
I no longer talked about you to my friend.
I no longer read our old texts.
I no longer miss you.
The only thing to get rid now is only the memories of you.
Which I am sure that it will take a lot of times.
Ah I how I wished those things that happened never happened between us.
If I was so clear of your intention,
I could have avoided you from day 0.
I would have make myself so fucking expensive that you would not even dare to look my way.
I would have respected myself more,
I would have respected myself more,
I would have respected myself more,
I would have love myself more,
I would have love myself more,
I would have love myself more,
RM told to love yourself more,
I should have listened.
I would have to be so expensive.
I should have known, the moment I set aside my self pride,
It would be a red warning for me,
That you werent the one.
That you are only there for a lesson for me.
A lesson for the lifetime
That words are cheap.
You know,
I never wished for anything bad to happen to you.
Instead I want you to succeed just like how you told me what you want to be.
I hope you will achieve your dream soon.
I can only pray for your success from afar.
Because before we were this,
You were my friend.
Eventhough now you were just a history.
I wish our path shall never cross. For my own good, and for you too.
Lets part way,
Delete me from your life.
I dont think what we have now can be save anymore.
They are ruined by your secrets.
Have a good life, im gonna have mine too without your presence.
Lets back to square one.
To being a stranger.
This is my goodbye.
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